My metal water bottle once featured an REI sticker in the shape of Texas. I tore it off one day, likely on a day I was frustrated with Texas summer heat. I’m picking at the sticker’s residue to avoid looking up.
“But what if you change things for just one person?”
This statement from my therapist makes me pause. About 70 percent of the sticker residue is gone, and now it looks like the remaining 30 percent is going to have to wait for another session where I don’t want to actively look at the person trying to help me.
I finally look up at my therapist and ask him to continue.
“We’ve established writing is good for you. You don’t have to have a theme, or an audience, to write what you want.”
For a moment I am annoyed at how well my therapist knows my type. He clearly knows I am a millennial who grew up sleeping on Batman sheets. He takes my continued pause as a signal to keep going.
“You let yourself get distracted doing what you think you should do instead of writing, and even when you do make the time to write, you freeze because you don’t want to bother writing something if you don’t have it all figured out. What I’m saying is write for yourself — you can’t please everyone, anyway. And who knows, maybe whatever you say will still get through to someone. Maybe something you write will still impact someone in a way they need.”
So that is what I am going to do.
I managed two blogs in the past — both of which managed an acceptable following and kept me busy, and more importantly, kept me writing. But over time, I lost steam both times. The first time I just ran out of ideas to share with people, and the second time I gave up was due to my website being hacked and turned into a porn site — which I found out was hacked after adding it to my resume, and yes, I found out the hard way.
So why am I trying for a third time?
As I grow older, passions and hobbies fade into the background, as “adulting” and careers take the center stage. While the lawn needs trimmed and I need a paycheck, I owe it to myself to create time to do something I care about, too.
We all do.
This time around, I’m trimming the extras that got in my way last time. I’m publishing on an established website, where there is minimal website maintenance or concern. I’m not focusing on a theme, I’m not building a brand, and I’m not trying to influence anyone about anything.
So what does that mean for you, as a reader? It means whatever you want.
I’m here to write about my experiences, my ideas and hopes, and my failures. I’m here to share my stories. I hope to learn more about myself (and others) along the way.
I spend a significant amount of time on I Wrote This For You, but on this website, I Wrote This For Me. And who knows, maybe I’ll prove my therapist’s point along the way.